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I’m editing right now, and it consumes my waking hours. It might not be my favorite part of the job, but it does need to be done right. By the end of the day, I’m wiped, but I can’t actually say the work is done. I lay in bed at night, thinking things like, “I don’t know why but I feel uneasy about that scene…” And then dream things like this:

800px-Derkovits,_Gyula_-_Sleeping_WomanI’m sitting down to dinner when my parents walk in. This can’t be because they live across the country, and I wonder if I’m dreaming. I notice my mom looks 35 again, and that is also suspicious. I notice that I look 20 again, and I find that even more suspicious. My sister-in-law walks in in a dreadful state, and I know that she’d never go out in public looking like that, so I’m even more suspicious that I may in fact be dreaming. I start serving dinner to my now very full kitchen.

Then I wake up, and as I’m waking up, I feel utterly victorious–I called it! Total dream! I knew something was off with that!

And then when I’m all the way awake, my mind goes back to that scene I was editing before I went to bed–that scene that made me feel uneasy. It isn’t right somehow. I’m missing something.

I grab my laptop and turn on the light. My husband grumbles something about needing sleep and pulls the blanket over his head, and I hunker down, telling myself, “I’ll just go over that scene one more time…”