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… then we’re doing it wrong.

Have you ever seen this comic?



It’s so true! We aren’t supposed to stay the same. Life changes us–our relationships and experiences–and if we’re doing it right, we mature as we go along.

Have you ever noticed what fantastic spouses people are in their sixties? I’m forty, and when I see a happily married man in his sixties, I’m always impressed with just how good he is at being married. They’re kind, considerate, know their wives very well, and compliment them often. When you see men like that, it’s easy to think, “Is it just their generation, or what?”

But it isn’t a generation, it’s life experience! When a man has been married for as long as I’ve been alive, he learns a thing or two about relationships. Was he that good at being married when he was twenty, or thirty, or forty? Probably not, but he hung in there for another twenty years, and look what he learned!

We women are the same, of course. Women in their sixties seem to know their husbands so well they can function in a silent short hand. No words even necessary–at least in front of other people. But that doesn’t happen over night, either. That comes from years of living with one man, figuring him out, and loving him through the ups and downs.

I’ve been married for fourteen years now, and I look back at those first few years of marriage–passionate, opinionated, emotional. Everyone goes through it, but it feels more earthshaking when it’s your marriage. And now, fourteen years in, there is just as much passion–just channeled a little more wisely. Not every mountain is there to die on.

In my novella that comes out this October in a collection published by Kensington Books, I look at marriage at different stages–brand new love with all the hope and optimism, and some couples who have been at it for a while…

Marriage is beautiful, challenging, and hard work. It’s also worth it! One day, I hope younger women look at me and say, “Was she always like that? Did they always understand each other that well?” Of course, the answer will be no! We will have gotten there the same way everyone else does–

 one step at a time.



Available to pre-order now!



For the Amish, the day after Christmas is for family, feasting, and exchanging simple gifts. And for three different couples, it will bring another precious chance for love . . .
New York Times and USA Today Bestselling Author Shelley Shepard Gray
Amish nanny Hannah Eicher never thought she’d ever see Rob Prince again. There was no way a relationship between her and the handsome English fireman could overcome her family’s objections—and their personal differences. But when he saves her from a sudden blaze, Hannah longs to see if they can turn holiday hope into a lifetime of happiness . . .
HIS AMISH ANGEL * Patricia Johns
She’s too outspoken to be a proper Amish wife. So as advice columnist “Miss Amish,” Maggie Lapp helps Amish and English with their romantic problems. But when her tradition-minded former fiancé accidentally reveals her secret, Maggie will need more than a miracle to make things right—and find a perfect love for all the Christmases to come . . .
Rachel Miller won’t let her disability keep her from selling heirloom plants and proving she can be independent. She certainly doesn’t need reckless Joseph Webber working at her greenhouse to pay off a disastrous Rumspringa stunt. But she and Joseph have more in common than they think—and their surprising holiday partnership might just blossom into forever joy . . .