Patricia Johns

One of the arguments against romance novels is that people say they give women unrealistic expectations of men. I suppose they worry that women will hold out, waiting to meet one of these heroes and not see a great guy right in front of her.

But I say, hogwash! Do women really expect men to be dukes, princes or billionaires? No! We aren’t fools. What draws a reader to a romance novel is the developing relationship.

And in that relationship, the women are deeply loved, desired and respected. Their needs are met, and the story isn’t over until that happens. The hero and heroine hit challenges and sometimes nearly break up. It isn’t like the road to true love is easy, even in fiction. But the heroine’s connection with the hero isn’t about simply satisfying his needs and being glad that she could. She isn’t staying with the hero unless her needs are met, too! The hero thinks she’s absolutely beautiful without having to change a thing. And the hero is the most attractive man in her eyes.

So tell me–what is wrong with that? Shouldn’t you find your partner attractive? That doesn’t mean they have to be a model–just attractive to you. Shouldn’t women be respected, loved and desired? That seems like a very low bar for a romantic relationship. And romance is about both partners getting their needs met.

So if reading romance novels makes women stop and think that maybe she does deserve a man who thinks she’s wonderful, and who cares about her thoughts and feelings, and that her needs matter, too… I think that’s great!

Our expectations are not unrealistic. I found a wonderful husband who is all of those things. And I know a lot of women who have equally great guys. Good men are out there–and I think it’s high time women found them.

Happy reading!

❤